Reality tv or RealLA tv

You be the judge.

As some of you know, Southland on TNT is one of my favorite TV shows.  It comes on Tuesday nights and at times, they re-run it the next day.

So I am sitting in my living room trying to figure out what clever nuggets of life I am going to share with you all today with the tv on in the background.   I have had it on all morning, but not paying much attention to it, it's on mute.  My balcony door is open, letting the beautiful 75 degree sunny day spill in.  (Don't hate, you can move here too.)  So I am just sitting on the couch, laptop in lap, surfing the nets.  Well all the sudden I look to the tv and there are all these police cars closing off streets and "breaking news" graphics scroll on the bottom of the screen.  With the tv muted, because I already saw Southland last night, I didn't pay much attention to it.  Then all the sudden I hear helicopters hovering and sounding rather close and sirens from cop cars/emergency vehicles all around my building.  Again, I don't pay much attention, perhaps it's filming - or who knows, it's LA, where nothing is surprising.

 So I turn my attention back to my laptop and the important status updates of my facebook friends... Randomly I glance up to the tv and, for whatever reason this episode of Southland looks painstakingly boring..it's still the same scene with cop cars blocking off streets that was on there 10 minutes ago.  LAME.  Then I hear more sirens and helicopters outside....huh.

 Back to the tv..Southland is just..so..bor-.........oh my God, that's my building, that's my neighborhood....I spring up and slam the sliding door shut...run to the tv, turn up the volume, oh my God, what is going on?  Officers on the scene, gunshots, suspect has shot a police officer...I look outside, still hearing the helicopters.  Oh my God...the announcer is talking about 45 cop cars on the scene...An officer has been shot....This is seriously bad!  Oh no, I have a job interview in an hour and I really need a job but that is going to be impossible since this real life drama is taking place right in front of my house and apparently a "neighbor" has called the news station reporting seeing a 40-year old white male with a bomber jacket, who the news guy is calling a "prowler" has been lurking around the neighborhood and all these cops seem unable to find him.  Then another caller said there are 2 "bad guys."  I am going to pass out I am so in pieces, this is in my street.....And it's hot outside, who would wear a black bomber jacket...I start freaking out more, yeah, it's totally possible, it's LA!

I try to remain calm, but  I still hear helicopters and sirens.  The tv guy is reporting police have requested more back up units to search a "densely populated neighborhood" and the entire area is on "lock-down" - no one is to open their doors, and to top it all off, I really need a diet coke and I was just going to walk to the corner store to get one. 


Oh man, this is totally awful and I don't know what.....WHAT IS THAT NOISE?  Someone is walking up the stairs to my apt....The bomber jacket wearing prowler or prowlers are coming to get me!  What?



I jump up, toss my laptop and grab the closest thing to a weapon I can find....my iPad...wait, what, too late, maybe I can challenge him to a game of sudoku for my life.  So I lightning fast make it into my roommate's room and literally dive and slide under the bed, like I am A-Rod sliding into home with an armed prowler chasing me, not harming my iPad, my weapon of mass applications and wait.......my heart is racing, my blood pumping and I hear the door knob turn, oh my God, the door is unlocked....I am frozen.  I hear him walk in, turn off the tv and head into the kitchen.  Oh shit, I hear a drawer open and I hear him pull out a huge butcher knife...Oh my God...there is dead silence, save my heart which, to me, sounds like the loud industrial music those trendy bars pump out where everyone has gold chains and drives Cameros with t-tops, anyway, I am like, damn it, I am going to die and I haven't even showered today.......


So like a lion in the Serengeti, I wait....I will wait it out, he doesn't know I am here, so fine, no sweat...I got all the time in the, he's coming into the bedroom...I can hear him....I am so scared, I close my eyes and start to pray...oh man, I am too young and haven't even been to an awards show yet..why is he wearing Prada snake-skin heels?  Why are his toes pink?  I gingerly, oh so slowly slide my head out from under the bed and it's my roommate, enjoying some Yoplait.  She is looking so puzzled and asks what am I doing....I said, "how did you get in here?"  She was all, "in where?"  "Here, in our home."  "Uh, the front door...why what's wrong with you, why are you under my bed, and why are you shaking?"  I tried to compose myself, "How did the cops let you through, the neighborhood is on lock down."  "Lock down?" she asks.  "YES, LOCK DOWN."  So I get up, dust myself off go turn on the tv to show her.  "Look dude, this is happening in OUR neighborhood."


She starts to laugh, "Caroline, that's like 30 minutes from here."


Duh, yeah, I know...ha ha ha.  You want to watch the Lakers game somewhere with me tonight?



Never a dull moment in the Southland!

Until next post -
Caroline